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Thursday, January 17, 2013

"Making your way in the world today takes everything you've got..."

Wellllll helllllllo all!!!  Hoping that all has been well in your world's.....things have been pretty good in mine!  ...althoughhhhh, it's been...ohhhhhhh....what.....a million and a half years since I've last posted anything...WHOA!!!  Now that we're on the downhill side of January, I'm hoping that all of your holiday's were SUPER SPECTACULAR!!  I love, love, LOVE the holiday's...they are the bestest time of year!!! 
Sooooo, I got the grandiose idea today to write a blog tonight...which in turn got my little brain turning and turning trying to think of something AHHHH-MAZZZZZINGGGGG to write about, but to no avail...I came up empty handed....hmmmm..you would think that I lead a pretty boring life, huh??  hahaha.....soooo anyway, I thought and thought and thought and I think that I FINALLY came up with something....so, herrrrre goes....
The one thing that you need to know about me is that I am EXTREMELY passionate about how we treat each other...this is a pretty broad statement, I'm talking about any person...friend, stranger, enemy...anyone...this applies to the ENTIRE human race....yes, when I say "grandiose" I meant GRANDIOSE...heehee!!!  Over these past few years of my existence, I've come to realize that I am EXTREMELY intrigued by how people treat other people...what they expect from both people they know and strangers, because we all have to admit that we usually are expecting something of somebody almost all of the time....sometimes those expectations are high and sometimes they are low...but, we all have expectations of one another...on whatever level it may be...
Sooooo, having said that...I have to confess something that I'm not proud of, but yet I'm not exactly ashamed of it either....I totally and completely lost my cool today with a good friend of mine....LOST IT...WAYYYYYY OVER THE TOP, LOST IT!!!  ...I am NOT proud of the way that I handled the situation, but I am happy and relieved that she is a good enough friend to not hold it against me...she just sat there and listened to me scream and vent and throw the HUGEST temper tantrum that I have ever thrown...WHOA!!!!  ....now I need to STOP and reevaluate....I've been thinking about it all day long....
Ok....now that I said that, back to the expectations thing.....I have, as I've mentioned in probably every post...some pretty amazing friends....they have stood by me through all sorts of things and moods and just more things and they have never failed me...so, I realized today that I do have SUPER HIGH expectations of my friends...expectations that I would hope that I live up to where they are concerned as well.....I never really thought about it....but, you know when one thing happens over and over and over and over...there comes a point when you can't take it anymore...you want to SCREAMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMMM.....your chest gets all tight, you can't breathe, your heart is racing...your face is red...your acting like a CRAZY MANIAC.....and you take it out on those closest to you, 'EXPECTING' that you will come out of this dark cloud unscathed and still have a wonderful friend....ahhhhhhh......I am the lucky one...I do still have a friend....thank goodness, because I probably don't deserve it! 
I have lived 30 some odd years and have yet to grasp the concept of the fact that basically people are just out for themselves, the majority of the people in our lives are just acqaintences to walk along the road with us for a while... and then we have the precious few that never leave us....how WONDERFUL are those people, for without them...where would any of us be???  I also realized that I have never felt an emotion quite so strong, in I think my whole life....my body actually reacted....my hands were shaking....something I hope to never experience again, but yet at the same time...I felt kind of ALIVE...that I was standing up for something that I believed in....YESSSSSSS!!!  Yes, most likely went about it in the wrong way, but there was definitely fire...haaaa!!!!  I want SO DESPERATELY to believe that there is goodness and compassion and a kind heart in everyone that I meet....I want to be surrounded by that in my life and I want to show that part of myself to the world....it's a bit disheartening to know that there are more people than I would like to admit..that ARE actually just out there for themselves...they've been broken by a society that has become SO insanely selfish that no one can see outside of themselves anymore...and the one's that can just give up because it seems like we're just little hamsters running on a wheel that is getting us no where...nothing against hampsters...I love them...they are the cutest little things....yes, a bit side tracked there...heehee!!  I guess, I just hope and pray that people start looking more at how they are treating other people...have a litte more consideration for someone else, even if it is "cramping your style"...it makes you feel sooooo good when you go out of your way to make someone's day a little bit easier....or to make someone smile...I know how it feels to have people do that for me...that extra little time they take to help me out....or when I'm having a bad day and I look up and see a smiling face waving at me...heehee...some people are so cute!!  I think that we all have it within us, I think that the world has just beaten us to the point that no one knows what to do anymore.....I guess what I'm trying to say is that...it is SOOOOO worth it to be genuine and honest and loving and kind....it gives hope and instills happiness and contentment....it's all of those warm fuzzy feelings we all love....and you know what....I think that we are all looking for that, we just don't know where to start.....everything starts with just one little baby, teeny tiny step.....just a little smile at a stranger and before you know it, you're walking around smiling and saying hello to everyone....just try this....next time you're out shopping...instead of looking at the floor or your cart or whatever may be on the shelf....smile at the person coming toward you.....MOST of the time, they instantly smile back....it's infectious....that's not the right word that I'm looking for, but you get what I'm going for....SPREAD KINDNESS and have consideration for another person, because it will give you SO much back.....ahhhhhhh....and there is my dream....all layed out in a million words...heeheee.....
Thanks so much for reading...I love writing in my blog, just need to keep up on it a bit more....have a FABULOUS night!!! 

Molly